Office Life – The Office Black Girl

365 Days of Posts, Office Stories, The Ebony Alpha, Uncategorized, Updates

Grateful Chaos

October 2, 2023by The Office Black GirlLeave a Comment

The last two weeks have not gone quite how I expected. Despite feeling like a Mack truck has run me over every morning, I am actually in a really good head space.

I just wanted to give a quick update as I finally start to recover from the craziness that has been the last two weeks…

My small business was given an opportunity for a new venture. Unfortunately, the timeline was right in the midst of a big work event, and I underestimated how long it would take. BUT…..I pushed through and got it done, and I think the client was really happy. Plus, it has given me a new fire for my business, which was slowly dying to glowing embers.
I got a raise at work and my own office. My boss is at retirement age, but she is pretty much the owner of the company’s right-hand (wo)man. I feel like she is doing all she can to make sure I don’t quit. I don’t necessarily want her job (at least not all of it; she wears too many hats), but if my business doesn’t blow up…I wouldn’t be surprised if I was named her successor.
My job has a yearly event that is almost two weeks long. I really wanted to update The Ebony Alpha, but between the crazy work schedule and my business project, I couldn’t muster enough brain cells to push through and put out anything good. But I am determined to get a few updates this week.
Lastly, I finally launched The Office Black Girl Coloring Book last month. The paperback is available on Amazon and the digital download is available on Etsy. As of today, I have sold 27 paperbacks and 20 digital downloads. That may seem small to some, but I know how hard it is to get noticed online for anything, so I am soooooo grateful for the orders. If you happen to purchase one, I would greatly appreciate it if you could leave a review (especially a picture one on Amazon ;-)). Gotta compete with the algorithm.

The chaos is calming down at work, but my creative juices are returning. So I am excited to get back into writing and maybe creating another coloring book.

Thank you for all of the new followers and the engagement I have received for The Office Black Girl on various platforms. It honestly means so much.

Here’s to October being an amazing month!

365 Days of Posts, Hair, Office Stories

White Men and Wig Obsessions

May 31, 2023by The Office Black GirlLeave a Comment

I don’t think I have ever worked somewhere where my hair was a topic of discussion as much as it has been since working for this company. I somewhat blame myself. I allowed myself to be open enough that, somehow, my honesty about a wig has turned into a frequent question about what is on my head.

My director informed me yesterday that the owner of the company asked about my hair. Apparently, he was unable to tell if my real hair was a wig or not. Keep in mind all of my wigs come from Amazon, and they are definitely the cheaper ones. But what I found even odder about the conversation was that he has never had a problem commenting on my hair before to my face, so why the change? But the time he asked, I was rocking my natural hair.

The director then proceeded to tell me that he asked if the other black woman in the office was wearing a wig. The director said, “Oh yea.”

On another note, I do find it interesting that when she started working here, her hair was natural and out. But about a week in, she has worn a wig with no natural hair to be revealed since. There is no judgment, but given that there are only two black women in this company, I wonder if her choice to conceal her natural hair is a conscious one or just a matter of convenience.

Back to me…

What is crazy to me is that the people who have the most comments about my hair are the white men in the office. The IT guy, who comes in once a week, makes a comment every time he sees me, even going as far as to tell me he prefers my real hair.

While I appreciate working for a company that hasn’t tried to punish me for my hair choices (because, let’s be for real, the biases are still real in the corporate world), I am over the fascination. It has taken me years to reach a point where I can leave my house with my natural hair, not in “ideal” curls but in the various levels of curl and puff with confidence. A confidence that comes after years of Eurocentric hair ideals messing with my psyche.

Even with this unwanted spotlight on my hair, I keep my head high, and I own every hairdo I rock to work. But I don’t like the feeling of my relative openness to talk about my hair is starting to make me feel like the star of some sort of freak show.

Uncategorized

My “Weirdness” About Memorial Day

May 29, 2023by The Office Black GirlLeave a Comment

I need to start off with the fact that Memorial Day and Veteran’s Day are not the same. Memorial Day is to remember those who passed away while serving our country. Veteran’s Day is for all who have served.

It is probably not that serious in the grand scheme of things, but for some reason, I find great annoyance when I see people’s posts, especially a business, that seems to lump the two together.

I will also add, my husband served, as well as my father and several other family members. It s probably what makes me more aware of the way people seem to confuse the two days, but I think it would slightly bug me even if I had no connection to the military.

As a business owner and someone who works in marketing, I always feel weird about posting about certain holidays, and Memorial Day is one of them. I am an overthinker, so that doesn’t help my cringe.

I feel some type of way about posting sales for a holiday that is meant to honor the dead, but I am not immune to engaging in a sale or enjoying the day off (though my current job does not believe in taking off for Memorial Day). I try to acknowledge the day for what it is, but as a black business owner operating during an overly sensitive time period, I get wary that a potential customer will look at my business as “too political.”

Even crazier, I get worried that my “patriotic” post will attract extreme right-leaning followers who will then be offended when I make a reference to being a “black woman-owned business.” While I don’t care if my customers’ political views align with mine, I just don’t want it to be an issue when they engage with me and my business.

With all of the crazy that runs through my mind, I do choose to at least post about it. A few years ago, a friend of mine from college was killed while serving. Only months before, he had messaged me that he was finally going to get out of the military. I found out he was killed through Facebook. He had served for as long as I had known him, but to think he was ready to get out and finally start a new chapter in his life…

…it makes it that much more important that I acknowledge Memorial Day for what it is. A remembrance of those who made the ultimate sacrifice.

365 Days of Posts, Office Stories

The Office Calorie Counter

May 1, 2023by The Office Black Girl1 Comment

Working in an office comes with its downfalls, especially in the weight department.

While I make an effort to step away from my desk as often as possible, there is no denying that office jobs are not very active. It doesn’t help if you work someplace that provides snacks or lunch.

I am a whole grown-ass woman. I am very aware of my weight and the choices I make. But there is something greatly annoying about the type of coworkers (usually female) who feel the need to constantly talk about calories and diets.

Like I get it, there are a lot of calories in this free lunch. But I don’t need you to rain on my parade with your depressing facts while I’m just trying to save some money in these wonderful days of inflation.

There is one department at my company that seems to indulge in the conversation of calories every once in a while, but for the most part, I live in the safety of coworkers who believe in the power of snacks and a candy bar stash on a crappy day.

This weekend, I was “lucky” enough to train a possible new hire. While her whole personality didn’t sit right with my spirit, it was her unprovoked need to talk to me about the calories in snack candy packs that sealed her fate in my desire to never work with her again.

You may ask, why does this bother me or think that I am being ridiculous in even blogging about this. And to some degree, I would find that to be a perfectly valid point. But I figured this rambling would be a nice break from the random moments of racist comments in the office 😉

That being said, the office calorie counters remind me of reasons people hate returning back to the office or why they never liked being in the office to begin with. Despite, the problematic stories I have shared so far, I actually like most of my coworkers and even the environment most of the time. But calorie counters hold a special place in my heart of annoyances.

This weekend just reminded me of the delights of being forced to interact with coworkers who feel the need to impose upon you their personal beliefs. Beliefs that are delivered with judgment and zero sense of awareness always make working in the office that much more enjoyable.

365 Days of Posts, Office Stories, Uncategorized

When the Racism Surprises You…

February 24, 2023by The Office Black GirlLeave a Comment

I wrote this on Monday and debated on whether I should post it. Then something reminded me of why I started this blog…

On Friday, I was discussing with a coworker about an upcoming work trip I had to take with my boss. I was explaining how there was really no reason for me to go. But my biggest concern was that I may have to share a room with her.

I work for a company where a good 35 percent (or more) of its employees are related or good family friends. The line of boundaries are definitely blurry on a daily basis. So I was concerned that my boss would think that my boundaries would allow her to think I would be okay sharing a room with her.

I am not.

While I may complain about my boss often, I realize it is more me and my need to complain rather than her…or so I thought.

As I was discussing with my coworker (white, male) that I didn’t want to share a room with someone who was going to ask me about why I did certain things to my hair at night or why I wore a bonnet to bed, he shared a problematic story with me.

There used to be a black male who worked in my department (long before me) and apparently he messed up something. She tells my coworker that his mess-up was “very niggerly of him.”

He claims he told her that she couldn’t say that and she proceeded to say it again.

I can’t even describe my feelings at the time though many thoughts ran through my head:

He was a little too comfortable repeating the word she used.
I was surprised, and I wasn’t
Maybe I need to reevaluate my employment here.

Here is where my lack of surprise comes in, she has said other derogatory things about people. Both times she said them to me.

Now before you look down on me from your high horse, I will admit I didn’t correct her. There are some people who you already know are a lost cause, and investing energy to correct them almost feels like a disservice to yourself. But I will understand if you disagree.

My husband was supportive of the idea of me leaving, but the reality is that I need this job. There are annoyances for sure, but I can’t ignore the fact that despite her MASSIVELY problematic flaws, my boss actually treats me well.

She doesn’t harass me when I am late. On more than one occasion, I couldn’t come to work for various reasons and she told me to just take care of myself and what I needed to do. Hell, she actually values my opinion at work and that is saying something given my past experiences.

But even as I type this, I can’t help but think about why I am sharing this. We live in such a woke time that I could see people judging me for not quitting or exposing her to Black Twitter.

The reality is, I know I am not the only black woman who has had to put up with shit to get to their final goal. My goal is to get me and my family to a better place financially and I need this job to do that. There are also connections that come with this job that I can’t deny either.

So at the end of the day, I have to admit that my vision of a life after this job outweighs the outrage I feel from a water cooler conversation.

However, we will see what the future holds…

Uncategorized

Office Black Girl Moments: Gifting Games

Featuredby The Office Black GirlLeave a Comment

It is a true skill to convince people that your backward way of thinking is acceptable. Yesterday, I got to witness this skill at my own expense.

I have read stories of servers having their tips taken by owners of restaurants. While that is a terrible practice, I was surprised to find myself in a similar situation working in an office setting.

At the beginning of the holiday season, my coworker informed me that if I received a gift as a worker for the company, I was supposed to turn it over to the owner. I didn’t think much of it because I had just started working for the company and didn’t think anyone would be gifting me anything.

But I did find the thought process behind it ridiculous. I was told that I was receiving that gift because I work for the company, and it is only because of my connection to the boss that I am getting that gift.

In an “I’m too lazy to argue back” kind of way, I could see how people would accept this control freak logic. I mean, it is true the person sending me this gift would not have likely crossed my path if not for this job. However, I find it problematic that that seems to be a justification to claim a gift that was not intended for you.

While I may have received my little gift card because I work at the company, it is one less gift card that this company would have received if someone was not working in my position. It wasn’t as if I received the gift without doing any work. I sat in meetings with this person and had multiple interactions with them just to reach a mutual agreement over a proposal.

So it baffles me that a business owner would think it was a good idea to undermine a positive interaction between their employee and a sales rep by claiming their Christmas gift.

But here is the kicker? In the middle of typing this post, I was in a bit of a mood when the owner swung by my desk. Because he was sorting through the gifts and I thought how crazy it was that a wealthy man would withhold a measly gift card from his employees (and a few other gifts from others). I texted my husband about my feelings at the moment, and 5 seconds later, the gift card was dropped off on my desk.

Caesar (that is what they call him for this gift-taking practice) dropped the card off and proceeded to tell me how he usually holds on to this stuff but not this one. I told my husband, and he said that Caesar probably felt my energy. I wonder if he thought the Office Black Girl would be the one to call him out on this shit practice.

Who knows. But now I am one $25 gift card richer and one more blog post closer to being a consistent writer.

Until the next time (which will be soon due to the amount of material I just got today)…

365 Days of Posts, Office Stories

Office Black Girl Moments: Vol. 1

Featuredby The Office Black Girl1 Comment

When I started this blog a few years ago, I intended to talk about my experiences as the only black woman in my department. If you know, you know.

But it was also for those who didn’t know. Being a black woman in the corporate world, especially the only woman of color in a department or even a whole company, is an experience, to say the least.

However, since the creation of this blog, I have since been laid off from that job, and I have found myself in several other work environments where the color of my skin has provoked awkward conversations. While I plan to share those stories here, I decided to mark this point as my day of change.

I recently saw a TikToker post about their one-year anniversary since they decided to start posting every day and how their life changed since then. And it made me think about how different my life might be if I had been consistent in the projects I pursued (and enjoyed) or if I didn’t just prioritize things to help dig myself out of debt.

So today is day one of me posting every day and seeing where my life will be in a year. I won’t lie, the content will probably be random, but I feel like that is appropriate. The black woman in your office has more going on than what you see every day, so here is a sneak peek into my thoughts, life, and the awkward moments of being The Office Black Girl